Did Kristy Hawkins invent the single bicep in-car selfie?
My memory is a little hazy about when camera phones became viable, but the file information attached to this pic says it was taken in January 2007, nine years ago.
Whether that makes it the earliest known example I couldn't say, but it's certainly the earliest example I've come across in my (less than comprehensive) research.
What we do know is that everybody's at it now...
But while the in-car selfie might have a short (if longer than imagined) history, images of female muscle and (muscle) cars go much further back to the ol' magazine years.
TREASURES FROM THE CARCHIVE
Rozann Keyser (left) shows us how she'd like to be paraded through the streets. If you are too young to be familiar with the glorious Rozann, you might like to check out her routine from the 1993 NPC Nationals. She won the Heavyweight title and turned pro the following year (but there was no parade as far as I know). Valerie Gangi (right, in the string) was, you may recall, a 1997 Ms Olympia competitor and then over 15 years later competed at the Olympia again, this time in the Physique Division.
And here's a real treasure.
The owner of that Mitsubishi could probably put it up for auction on the female muscle forums and make a mint - "as touched by Zuzana in that bikini". Just the tyre even.
Other cars might be worth a bob or two as well...
"Scented by Brigita"
"Soiled by Dena" (sorry Dena)
Probably not for sale.
And perhaps most valuable of all...
"As washed by Julie"
Now do you remember that scene in The Counsellor with Cameron Diaz getting freaky on Javier Bardem's car? I wonder where Cormac McCarthy got the idea for that...
As I've said before [and you will no doubt say again... YAWN! - ed.] real performances from female bodybuilder's in their routines are few and far between these days. I've big-upped Sheila Bleck's artistry before, her commissioning of original music and elegant, athletic posing, but as far as this side of the pond is concerned, absolutely positively nobody does it better than Rosanna Harte.
Which, given that she is a graduate in Contemporary Dance, and, as we've seen/heard, no mean singer and lyricist, should not be very surprising. I love making my routines and performing them, she says. I love the way I can combine all my skills and hobbies into one fun performance. I write my own songs/raps and choreograph a dance routine/bodybuilding routine and get to show off my sculpted physique.
And I, for one, love watching her perform. Sadly though (and once again, my apologies if you have read this before here) it's a rare bodybuilding show indeed that gives the women more than a minute or so, and as a result Rosie's scope to express her full range of talents is somewhat limited. Nevertheless, she can still give quite a performance when competing, as this routine from the 2013 Arnold Amateur demonstrates.
If she can do so much in a little over a minute, then give her four (or more) and she can give full rein to her myriad talents. You can find her rapping, stripping (not all the way, but, you know), flying around the stage and obviously delighting in showing off that sculpted physique to its best advantage at the 2012 UKBFF Leeds here, but my pick of the Rosie guest posing routines available to view is our Clip of the Week this week, "Dumbbells Are A Girl's Best Friend" from the UKBFF East Midlands in 2013.
Not being the biggest fan of the show, this completely passed me by at the time, but here, on national prime time TV last year, was Rosie displaying her body and skills.
I believe [insert name of country]'s Got Talent is something of a global brand, so I won't waste any time explaining just what the hell is going on here, but I will say that Rosie's act didn't quite make it to the main show on the main channel (ITV) but was featured on the less-watched "extra" show (on ITV2), where this clip comes from.
Where to begin?!
First of all, we should say how amazing she looks, and how well she comes across as a person before and after her performance. I'm fully aware of how massively edited these clips are, but despite the cutaways to shocked faces, the "public" at the show seem to have responded pretty positively. I think most men that have never met a female bodybuilder in person have a pre-conceived idea about us, she has said in the past. I think when they meet me they change their mind! It's fair to say that her appearance here changed a few minds in the audience - both male and female - that day.
What's most interesting though is the reaction of the judges, especially the female judges. The look on Aleesha Dixon's face (she's second from the left as you look at them) when Rosie takes off her jacket and reveals her glorious back is absolutely priceless. Is she really so horrified? Perhaps she genuinely is, and that's all it is, but it's interesting that the strongest negative reaction comes from a woman. Is Aleesha's horror perhaps more rooted in deeper, subconscious feelings of inadequacy?
Yes, yes, I've read a couple of schoolboy psychology books and I think I know what I'm talking about, but check out how difficult both Aleesha and Amanda Holden - the other female judge - find it to actually look at Rosie (either in the eye or at that body) during the feedback. The reaction of women when faced with a real alpha female perhaps...
Relax. Physique is Lightweight, Middleweight and Light-heavyweight Bodybuilding in disguise, or at least that's what it has turned out to be, despite the complaints of some of the (less muscular) Physique women themselves. And until the IFBB/NPC bigwigs do see their plans to "tone it down by 10-15%" come to fruition, that means there's lots and lots of beautiful female muscle in the division, especially when the cream gather as they did in Las Vegas a couple of weeks ago. Yes of course we miss the Ms O, but that didn't stop us enjoying the Physique Olympia, and all this week on FMS we're going to be paying tribute to these spectacular, muscular women.
First, the moan. Statuesque and Amazonian, glamorous and beautiful, athletic and graceful, and strong and sexy, the 28 women in the 2015 Physique Olympia line-up collectively provided a veritable feast for the female muscle lover's eyes... but not live, not in motion. Though the other parts of the Olympia weekend were made available to view on a live stream, unfortunately for the women themselves and us fans, the WPD portion of the Saturday show was not deemed (by who?) worthy of inclusion.
Obviously this is nothing less than a crime and whoever is responsible should be hunted down and made to pay, but my purpose here today is not to rant but to appreciate and celebrate the show these magnificent, muscular women put on.
There were GLUTES...
The top 5 hit their rear double biceps
While not all of the women - actually not any of them as far as I can see - opted for a posing suit as revealing in the rear as runner-up Kira Neuman (second from right above), there was enough beautifully sculpted gluteal meat to more than satisfy this fan at least. Flared to the max or clenched to accentuate the hamstrings, these bodacious bottoms will no doubt keep our old friend C. Moore busy with his "inspections" well into the new year, perhaps even until next September!
As I've said before on the blog, I find that Physique routines remind me of the kind of performances we once saw female bodybuilders perform in the days when there was only one division and each woman had plenty of time to express themselves. Much more than their contemporaries in Bodybuilding, the Physique women showcase their grace and power with routines that combine dance and gymnastics with the all-important posing. It's a killer combination of the best of Fitness and the best of Bodybuilding in one. And that means getting down and dirty on that stage floor.
Heather Grace
Last year nobody epitomised what I'm going on about better than the champ herself. Some things were the same - Juliana Malacarne was crowned Ms Physique Olympia again - except this year I haven't got to watch her performing her routine (he said, coming dangerously close to slipping back once again into rant mode). What images I can see of Juliana's 2015 routine though suggests it was very much worth watching in all its bombastic gymnastic fantastic muscle flexy glory - which doesn't make the fact that it wasn't available to watch live any easier to take now, does it?
There was SMOOCHING...
Gosh. It may just be my (I know, sordid) imagination, but as well as putting her lipstick all over Juliana's face, it seems to me that Mindi is copping a right good feel of the two-time champ right there. Not that I blame her and not that I think Juliana minds. She doesn't seem averse to a bit of coppage herself. She's certainly getting a feel for Kira's arm there, and again, who among us wouldn't do exactly the same in her position? Ecstatic muscle women touching each other up as they kiss and cuddle...?! Gosh.
There were ABS...
Callout #2, I believe
There are some Physique women who don't do our old Hall of Fame pose in their compulsories - so I guess that means the "Abdominals & Thigh" is slightly less than compulsory. And although there are many many women who seem to relish it, there aren't exactly a plethora of images of the 2015 WPD Olympia women with their hands behind their heads. The Physique goddesses I'm featuring this week with their own post excepted, the below probably represents a kind of "Best of the Rest" selection. To be perfectly honest, there aren't even enough great abs and thigh shots for a "Next Best" selection, unfortunately. So extra credit to those who did hit it on the night.
Somewhat making up for that though was the fact that some of the ladies finished off their compulsories with a very uncompulsory (by this time next year it may well be outlawed the way things are going) sort of pec-popping most muscular.
All in all, then, it's a damn shame there was no live stream, but nevertheless, the images we do have of the event reveal these stunning women at their most majestic, their most ripped, and their most muscular. And what's not to like about that?
I'll be using more images pictures from Team Andro and Eastlabs this week, but there are also galleries available at Muscular Development and NPC News Online, the latter having a sizeable selection of backstage shots as well - AND a pump room video...
