The (Mis)Adventures of C. Moore Glootz II

Catch up with Part I here.


Not the object of my teenage affections - she was way better-looking!

School did not end well for C. Moore. In retrospect, my attempts to win the heart of the only female P.E. teacher under 40 were, though heartfelt, rather misguided. I was asked to leave before taking my A-levels, and, somewhat understandably, there wasn't much enthusiasm among local schools to welcome C. Moore into their communities.



At home my bedroom was adorned with pictures of muscular goddesses carefully cut out of muscle magazines (I always bought two copies of everything - one to destroy and one for the files), so you can probably imagine what my own family thought of me.



I sweated out that summer working all hours in a dry cleaning shop, saving almost every penny - I even stopped buying magazines, although I did steal a few. It was time for C. Moore to follow his passion. And so, on an unseasonally chilly September morning, with my father, mother and sister dutifully (but cheerily) waving me goodbye, I boarded my flight to the Land of Female Muscle. Destination - New York.


Central Park - but not in my experience

I'd like to say the States were everything I'd hoped they would be, but sadly my act - illegal (after my tourist visa had run out), unskilled, secondary school dropout with questionable social skills and probably too many questions about where the local gyms were - didn't play very well in New York, and nor did it play well in California, Hawaii (though I swear I saw Marjo Selin drive by while I was there) and Phoenix, Arizona.



But down in Florida, which was my last hope - I hitched there from Arizona, sleeping on gas station roofs when the weather allowed, bus stations when it didn't - I finally found some work with accommodation thrown in, and C. Moore became the handyman at a small resort complex just outside Tampa. I didn't see any female muscle there, but at least I wasn't destitute anymore, and the season was pretty much neverending.



I stayed - for two years. I got good at fixing pretty much anything, and even developed some social skills. I went running along the beach (never saw a single muscular bum, not one), but I got a great tan. I experienced my first hurricane. And my second. I lost my virginity, but not, as I imagined I would, to a female bodybuilder who I'd marry.


Tera Guzman, a good few years later

And I went to my first Bodybuilding show. The 1998 NPC Florida Championships. Kerri Crotty won the Overall, though Tera Guzman and Christine Wan are probably the most familiar names from the eleven who I saw compete that day.


Christine Wan, not in her 1998 Bodybuilding shape

To say that this was the excitement and experience I had crossed the pond and suffered so much hardship for would be a little wide of the mark. Looking back now I wonder at my naivety - I really did think I would be able to just saunter into the pump room, and I really did think once I was there that it would be OK to just feel up some prime female beef. I honestly thought they would be grateful to meet a true fan.



My last few nights in the US were spent in a hospital with a cop sitting next to my bed. As soon as I was discharged, I was deported. C. Moore was driven to the airport at the expense of the county taxpayers, and a big black X was stamped into my passport to ensure I would never return to American soil. I've never tried. But as soon as the plane landed me back in Blighty I set about planning the next contest I would attend.



For a brief - a very brief - moment (and as totally wrong and inappropriate as my behaviour was) (how's that?) [fine - legal dept.] I had laid my hands upon a muscular female body. Everything that happened next - the shouting, the bleeding, the pain, the handcuffs, the mugshot, the hospital food, the piss-taking cops - had been worth it.

Isn't It Iconic, Don't You Think?

One of you lovely readers, responding to the Women of the Year 2013 post from just before Christmas, commented that 'that first pic [of Alina Popa] could be iconic'.



For some reason, these words stuck in my head. I looked at the pic again, closely. And, yes, I thought to myself, absolutely, it is, indeed 'iconic'. What bothered me though was why. What makes this image, more than the others of Alina in the post, more than all the other countless images of Alina (excepting a handful perhaps), 'iconic' exactly? What, precisely, is an 'iconic' image?

The first port of call was the dictionary, which defined 'iconic' as relating to or of the nature of an icon. OK... So let's look up 'icon' then: 1. An image; a representation. 2. An important and enduring symbol. 3. One who is the object of great attention and devotion; an idol. 4. Computer Science A picture on a screen that represents a specific file, directory, window, option, or program.

Alina is many things, but she's definitely not meaning number four. The other three though, all seemed to fit. But although I felt I now had a better handle on the meaning of the word 'iconic', I still wasn't really any clearer on what makes an 'iconic image'.

I dug a bit deeper.

What I found was that it is generally agreed that to be 'iconic', an image has come to have a symbolic meaning that is readily understood. The image causes people to think about what it represents, rather than what it is. So, when you see Che Guevara, it's violent revolution. Gandhi, and it's peaceful revolution. Einstein with his tongue sticking out is madness and genius in the same place. The Stars and Stripes is whatever the USA means to you. In religion, there's the cross, the crescent, the star of David...

I see...

But now I had a new doubt nagging away at me. Just for the sake of argument, let's say the image of Alina represents something like 'the beauty and strength of the muscular woman'. Well, then isn't it the case that any image of Alina does the same? Isn't it the case then that any image of any muscular woman represents the same thing?

The answer is obviously 'No'. So I'm back to square 1, not really any clearer on why this image strikes us as 'iconic' while others don't. I decided to take a different approach, starting with the image itself. I looked at Chris Zimmerman's image of Alina again (hard though looking at Alina so much was, I really had the bit between my teeth now...)



What I came up with was: 1. It's an image of a woman who, by general consensus is something approaching the epitome of a female bodybuilder, and what's more, she's in absolutely prime condition; 2. The subject, though a female bodybuilder, is not hitting any conventional bodybuilding pose, nor is she wearing the conventional 'uniform' of a female bodybuilder - the posing suit; 3. Zimmerman's style is, it seems to me, (and I say this with no specialised knowledge of photography at all, so I may be completely wrong) all his own - nobody shoots these women quite like he does.

OK, now to test the theory!

1. Does the female bodybuilder in the image have to be at the top of the sport, and does she have to be in prime condition?



When I thought about other iconic images of female bodybuilders, these two sprang to mind immediately. I imagine Bev Francis and her most muscular in her orange posing suit at her biggest and best seems to answer the question in the affirmative. This image of Kim Chizevsky will, I imagine, be a little more controversial, but to me, this is the image of Kim. I don't know why I associate this pose and the black posing suit with her more than any other of the FBB 'icons', but I do.



Having dealt with one era of female bodybuilding, I moved on to Lenda Murray. Choosing one image of her as iconic was, I found, much more challenging because there were so many more candidates. Nevertheless, as I searched through my (not inconsiderable) Lenda archive, for me, this image stood out.

Who else? I thought. Iris, sure, but it's hardly the case that only Ms Olympias or should-have-been Ms Olympias can qualify as icons. I doubt I'll get too much stick if I say I think the two images below are iconic, and Cathey Palyo and Melinda McNabb never came anywhere near being crowned Ms Olympia.



And so I broadened the search to two of my all-time favourites, and, as with Lenda, found myself struggling to find the defining iconic image of either of them!

With Denise Hoshor, I found I could narrow it down to one set of photos, but when trying to pick one from the set as the iconic image of Denise, it proved impossible. And furthermore, as with Lenda, I was aware that other fans might well put forward other sets or shots of Denise as more apt to represent her at her iconic best.




With another of my all-time favourites, Gina Davis, I couldn't even narrow it down to a single set. There are so many top top photos of Gina (I looked at so many goodies while I was trying to choose I did begin to wonder if there was a bad photo of her out there) that the best I could do was make a short list that never got any shorter than the wonderful images below.





So confused had I become that I'd forgotten what the immediate question had been!

Ah! Does the female bodybuilder have to be at her peak and at the top of her sport? From the selection above, I could only surmise the answer was 'yes... maybe'. Bev was a yes, as was Kim. Lenda, it seems to me, had a few peaks at least, and in my iconic image of her, 'The Naked Sleeping Lenda', she certainly wasn't in her contest prime. Neither Palyo nor McNabb were ever at the 'top' of female bodybuilding and in the image I selected Palyo wasn't in prime condition, McNabb absolutely was.

What about the second conclusion I'd drawn from Zimmerman's Alina pic, the point about her not being in a posing suit and not hitting a regulation pose? Again, you can see that, based on the above selections the answer was a rather unsatisfactory 'sometimes, but not always'.

ARRRRRRGH!

Perhaps the third point would prove more fruitful, the point about Zimmerman's style? I perused his Facebook offerings and other pictures of his in my collection. I had to agree with his assertion that he can 'light the shit out of muscular women'. His style is certainly unique among FBB photographers, and there are many many fantastic shots among his body of work.

Are there some female muscle photographers more iconic in their style than others?

Bill Dobbins sprang to mind immediately. Like the image of Bev Francis' most muscular above, one other image I am absolutely certain no one will argue is iconic is the one that adorns the cover of his finest achievement, The Women: Photographs of the Top Female Bodybuilders.



Yes! I thought. Dobbins and Zimmerman, photographers with an 'iconic style', photographers who, through their work, create the iconography of female muscle...

Perhaps there is something there, but at the same time I was sure that it was Women's Physique World that had given us more iconic images than any other source, and neither Dobbins nor Zimmerman had anything to do with that. In fact, I realised that images I would call iconic had been made by a wide variety of photographers and in a wide variety of styles. Square 1 again!

Have you reached any conclusions at all?! I hear you cry.

Well, yes. Sort of. Just bear with me...

The fact that Bill Dobbins' image of Nikki Fuller was a cover made me wonder if that was something that could make an image more likely to become iconic.

Check out these ones of Diana Dennis and Juliette Bergaman...



They're familiar, aren't they?

Well maybe, just maybe, that's because both of them were WPW covers...



And the other thing that did occur to me was that so many of the images I thought of when I tried to conjure up 'iconic images' in my mind were images I had first seen in the magazines in my early female muscle lovin' years. Perhaps it is the case that an image from those days when there were so many fewer images around is so much more likely to be thought of as 'iconic' because almost all female muscle heads of the same generation had almost identical experiences of first seeing them?

Having said that though (he said, indicating the imminent arrival of another unsatisfying conclusion), as with Chris Zimmerman's image of Alina, there are, it seems to me anyway, images that, as the reader who started this whole sorry thought process off said 'could be iconic' being produced now.


Cindy's glistening abs; Anne Freitas' freaky 'Christmas tree'


Gabriela Bankuti by Zoltan Vegh of Fitness Exposure (now there's another female muscle photographer with an 'iconic style'...)

Sorry I haven't really got to the bottom of anything. It might have something to do with the goddess being photographed, the point she's at in her career or her conditioning. It might have something to do with the pose or lack of it, and/or what she's wearing (or not wearing). It might have something to do with the style of the photographer, or how old the image is, or when and where you first came across it...

Perhaps the only conclusion I can reach is that you know an iconic image when you see one! But even so, they are GREAT pictures, aren't they?!

Man, you're probably saying to yourself, this guy has far too much time on his hands! Well, in my defence, I was on holiday. But, yes, OK, I should probably go and get something to eat now.

Enjoy! And I'd love to hear what you think the 'iconic images' of female bodybuilding are. Comment box or 6ft1swell@gmail.com, as always.

Ms International: Did You Know...? [Part 2]

…in its 28-year history, there have been 12 different Ms Internationals.

Over the same period, there have been nine Ms Olympias. Three women have held both titles at the same time, the first to do so being Kim Chizevsky in 1996. The feat was not repeated until Yaxeni Oriquen won both in 2005. You can probably guess that Iris Kyle completes the list, and is the only woman to have won both titles in the same year more than once.



In fact, Iris has been the reigning Ms International and Ms Olympia SIX times! She first did the double in 2004, repeating it every year since with the exception of 2005, when she didn’t compete, 2008 – more about that shortly – and last year, when she didn’t compete due to injury. On each occasion that she hasn’t won the Ms I during this period, Yaxeni has won it instead.




…even Iris gets the blues.

Or to be more precise, the ‘bumps’.



As noted above, Iris’ record at the Ms International since 2004 is pretty much flawless. She either isn’t there or she wins. But in 2008, Iris was very much there, and what happened to Iris at the Ms I that year is right up there with the Paula Bircumshaw saga (see Sunday’s post) as an example of just how bizarre the world of top female bodybuilding can be.



Iris was shocked to find herself not only out of the top 1, but out of the top 6, specifically in 7th place. Some time after the contest she said, I’m still quite puzzled. From the judges standpoint, I have received no feedback leaving me with thousands of unanswered questions to this day. I made a couple of calls but I couldn’t get through to who I would love to speak to.



Only later did one of the judges reveal where Iris had lost her title. In a radio interview, head judge Sandy Ranalli confirmed a rumour that ‘bumps’ were responsible for Iris’ placing. Her shoulders were a little bit, you know, distorted. There were distortions in her glute area, she said. At this level of competition, [there is] not a big difference between athletes, those things come into play. It was the distortion.

Now, take a look at these images from the show. Do you see any ‘distortions’?



I think what the judges were talking about were her muscles, but let’s say that they were right. If they had felt she was so grotesquely ‘distorted’, why didn’t they place her last? If they felt the ‘distortions’ were somehow the result of some kind of foul play, why didn’t they disqualify her? Why, to those judges on that day, was the ultimate sanction that occurred to them to place her 7th? Out of the money. Just.



Ah, the wonder of IFBB female bodybuilding judging truly never ceases to amaze! How many other sports do you know where the rules or criteria for success are not only constantly being rewritten, but are often rewritten during the contest they relate to. It’s almost as if the IFBB are trying to make a farce of female bodybuilding. After all, does this happen in any of the other events at their shows?

I don’t think you need me to answer that.


...heavyweights always win.

In the same way that having different weight classes came and went out of fashion at the Ms Olympia in roughly the same period, there were lightweight and heavyweight classes at the Ms International from 2000 to 2005.



At the Ms O in 2001, Juliette Bergmann, a lightweight, defeated Iris Kyle for the overall title, but at the Ms I, the heavyweights won every time. Brenda Raganot and Dayana Cadeau both lost out twice in the overall posedown; Brenda to Vickie Gates in 2000, and Yaxeni in 2005; Dayana to Vickie in 2001, and to Iris in 2004. In addition, lightweights Valentina Chepiga in 2002 and Cathy Le François the following year both lost out to heavyweight Yaxeni.



I can’t help feeling that the whole thing became a lot less interesting after the end of the different weight classes. Although it’s very uncommon for a lightweight to beat a heavyweight, at least there are two winners, two contests, two posedowns and then an extra posedown at the end to decide the overall title. More variety for the spectator, more opportunity for the women not blessed with the genetic gifts of the likes of Vickie Gates and Iris Kyle to have their moment. Now we are faced with the prospect of absolutely no bodybuilding classes at all, the days of the weight classes seem all the rosier.




…25 years is a long time.



If the Arnold Sports Festival and the Ms International were married, they’d have celebrated their silver anniversary in 2013. When the union began, George Bush was replacing Ronald Reagan as US President, Ayatollah Khomeini had just placed a $3m bounty on Salman Rushdie’s head, and Hungary had just started dismantling its border with Austria, heralding the end of the ‘Iron Curtain’.

Jackie Paisley was the first Ms International crowned in Columbus Ohio.



25 years later, George Bush’s son has been and gone from the White House, Khomeini is dead, though Rushdie lives, and Hungary, along with most of the other countries once behind the ‘Iron Curtain’, is a member of the European Union along with its former ‘capitalist enemies’.

Iris Kyle won what was quite possibly the last Ms International to be held at the Arnold Sports Festival, though we hope that she will not be the last Ms International of all.



Maybe it is time for a change, perhaps a big change in the way professional female bodybuilding is run. But more of that later in the week.



Sign the petition and make your voice heard.

And enjoy this and other Ms International action from recent years on jlelmariachi’s youtube channel