Far From Routine: Ozzy's Evening Show

A little while back FMS asked you lovely readers what your "all-time favourite" routines were, and last month we brought you a week of those choices as well as some of our own selections. As noted at the time, it being summer and all, not every reader managed to get their choices to us in time to make the posts, so we promised we'd be revisiting the theme again in the future, and today that's what we're doing.

All selections (and text) are courtesy of Ozzy of Ozzy's Female Muscle fame. Not all of his choices are actual routines, but given the time and effort it must have taken him to put this all together, we've included all of his choices. I think you'll agree it all amounts to quite a fantasy show, and your seat has the best view in the house. Pace yourself!

Ozzy says: When I saw your question about what would be our best routines, I understood that as "What are the routines which I jerked off to the most?" Hard to choose, because I've unloaded a lot of cum watching a lot of competitions!

But these are mine, in no particular order.

COMPULSORIES

SHANNON COURTNEY
2013 NPC USA Championships

Unfortunately for us, there are not a lot of videos of Shannon on stage, so the few I have are like precious diamonds! In this one, as always, Shannon just exudes sex. The way she shows her ass is just totally insane!!! She knows perfectly well that at this moment every man in the room is going crazy watching those two huge pieces of hard meat! Hands just have to be in pockets... I hope they had a few tissues!




BRIGITA BREZOVAC
2011 IFBB Toronto Pro

We all know that Brigita is a cum factory. Her body, swollen with muscles, is a true hymn to masturbation. But when I first saw this routine, I couldn't believe what was in front of my dick! She's SO huge that her bra explodes!!! Boy, it was too much for me, almost like a dream come true... I had to change my pants immediately, and I still think it's one of the most exciting things I have seen on a stage.




ROUTINES

CHRISTINE ENVALL
2001 IFBB Championships (?)

It's just impossible to not have an insane hard-on watching Christine on stage, flexing her huge manly muscles. She just knows that she's a sex object, and she enjoys that! Her most muscular pose is probably the best in all the FBB world. I truly cannot count the times I jerked off watching her meaty pecs.




MARJA LEHTONEN
2001 Jan Tana Pro Classic

I couldn't do a list without putting Marja on it, but it's so hard to choose just one routine of hers! I mean, I've watched all of them, I know all of them, and I jerked off every time I saw a new one. But I finally decided to choose the first one I ever saw, the 2001 Jan Tana, because it was such an unbelievable shock to see this female for the first time. Again, I cannot count the times I've jerked off to this routines since 2001, I know it every detail of her moves, her expressions, and release anytime she flexes her insanely huge biceps!




ANDRULLA BLANCHETTE
1997 Ms Olympia

This was the very first video with muscular women I bought, and I guess you can imagine how many times I watched it! Hard to choose between all those sexy freaks who participated in this competition, because there were a lot of huge and sexy ladies: Kim Chizevsky, Nancy Lewis, Sue Myers... But almost every time it was Andrulla who won. I just know her routines perfectly, her moves to the music, her expressions, even after all these years, releasing after she's on the floor, shaking her huuuge quads, and she hits a double bideps pose... Cum!!!




CINDY PHILLIPS
2006 CBBF Canadian Championships

I remember perfectly the first time I saw this video. I immediately thought: "Wow, that's the most erotic thing I've ever seen!" and, of course, just after, I jerked off like a madman. Cindy has always be one of my faves, and in this routine, I think she's at her best. I dreamed of her so much... I was truly obsessed by her!




GINA DAVIS
2004 NPC Nationals

Another great routine, so much better than any porn, the huuuge and sexy Gina on stage! Her smile, her attitude, her body... All of it just gives me an insane boner! The way she moves, slow and cocky, I guess she can hear the sound of the loads in the room, the moans of pleasure of the lucky bastards who were there at the time! Lucky bastards who will always be able to say "Yes, I was there, and I jerked off!"




I could, Ozzy adds, go on for hours and add Denise Rutkowski, Heather Armbrusst, Yaxeni Oriquen... but I think we are all grateful for his selections as they are, and maybe a little thankful that he didn't go on.

I, for one, need to get some fluids on board.

If you haven't sent your own selections in yet, please don't think you're too late, send them in (with or without text) to the usual email address: 6ft1swell@gmail.com

Thanks to Ozzy for a great show with a great commentary!

All the clips in a rar here.

Far From Routine: Ellogon's Treasures Part II

Today, more reader nominations and a personal favourite from Ellogon's YouTube treasure trove - first, some serious shock and awe, and then some seen once never to be forgotten European beauty - punctuated by a guest poser who does it, according to the reader who suggested the routine, "how it should be done". You lucky people!

Reader Request

CHRISTINE ENVALL
1997 NABBA Universe

The first of two routines from Eurosport's coverage of the 1997 NABBA Universe, and one of several requests for Christine, but the only one we received in time to put the posts together, unfortunately. Not, I grant you, the greatest quality clip, but I can't help feeling that in HD that glorious body in that posing suit might well be too much for the old ticker to take. Christine physique is frankly so overwhelming it's hard to make it to the end even though she's slightly blurry. And it's less than a minute long!




Reader Request

PATRICIA VELDMAN
1997 NABBA Universe

There's not much of the woman who beat Christine on this occasion out there, but every second of Patricia Veldman in this clip and elsewhere seems to be 100% solid female muscle gold. The most musculars that close the routine must be among the most capped and giffed pieces of posing ever. And it's not hard to see why.




Reader Request

SHARON MARVEL
Guest Posing

It starts with a pose that leaves you in no doubt that Sharon's glutes are rightly legendary, it ends with a quad shake that you'll be daydreaming about all day and dreaming about all night and will probably still be on your mind at work Monday...



Think you can handle more? Check out another of Sharon's sexy routines here.


As with the NABBA Universe clips above, the last three selections (all my picks, all from the 1995 IFBB Europeans) hark back to the golden days of female muscle on Eurosport. I was actually living in Italy at this time, which meant the channel was available to me free (not the case in the UK). Yes, the camerawork/direction did often leave a lot to be desired - close-ups are fine, but do we need close-ups of their hair? But Friday evening, when I remember the Bodybuilding/Fitness hour tended to be on, was a very special time every week, though perhaps not always quite as special as the Friday when I first witnessed Inna, Elena and Angela perform these routines.


Swell Pick

INNA UIT
1995 IFBB European Amateur Championships




Swell Pick

ELENA KURAKOVA
1995 IFBB European Amateur Championships




Swell Pick

ANGELA CILIONE
1995 IFBB European Amateur Championships




I don't know about you but I'm exhausted.

See you tomorrow. Fluids, remember. Fluids.

Toronto: The Magnificent Seven

As the Women's Bodybuilding at the Omaha Pro had been slagged off both in advance and afterwards, I resolved to avoid all previews and reports from Toronto. It seems to me that however big or small the field, whatever you might (subjectively) think about the quality of the women on show or the judging, I think what matters in these harsh times is that the show took place and female bodybuilders were part of it. Who knows how long much longer that will be the case? Let's celebrate while we still can.

In Omaha the previous weekend there had been ten of them. Last Saturday in Toronto, they were but seven. And FMS is going to give each and every one of those seven some appreciation in today's post. There'll be no gripes and no whinging. Just love and admiration. They are female bodybuilders, and they are all magnificent.

7 AMANDA AIVALIOTIS



After winning her pro card at last year's NPC North Americans, Amanda made her professional bow in the city she calls home at the age of 45. Good to see Amanda didn't neglect to get a cheeky most muscular or two into her routine - something she is known for - and I'm also happy to see she hasn't taken any notice of the forum posters who don't like her on stage facial expressions, 'cos I love 'em.



Amanda started training at the age of 16 - The moment I touched a weight, I was ready to sculpt my physique. Once I stepped on stage, I was hooked on bodybuilding - she says, reckoning it is the Spartan Greek in her blood that provides the fascination she has with creating the perfect physique. Her gym sounds pretty Spartan too - brick walls and chains hanging from the ceiling - she says. And now she has broken her pro cherry, she plans to compete again this year, possibly twice more.




6 BONNIE SWITZER



Bonnie who? I said to myself as I looked at the competitor lists before the show (and no, that doesn't count as a preview). Boy did I feel stoopid when I saw the prejudging pics late Saturday night UK time. Of course! How many other Bonnies are there?



For the first time since 2012, the Bonnie who is better known as Pappas (although it seems she's been Switzer (or Pappas Switzer) for a while) [easy on the brackets! - ed.] graced the stage in Toronto, and to my eyes anyway, she looks just as charismatic as I remember her. I've caused a few accidents! she says. I can believe it. And she's still on a mission. I love being able to turn it on in the gym, sweat, swear and lift with the best of them, but also able to go out and prove that female muscle can be sexy, feminine and very appealing. Mission accomplished in Toronto, I reckon.




5 MARGIE MARTIN



Look at those big and juicy thighs cascading out of those denim shorts - if there was a prize for the best check-in outfit, I reckon Margie would win it at every show. And like Amanda, Margie squeezed out a most muscular. Could she be any more "vesuvial"?!



She was pretty much FMS' Swoon Queen in 2014, and the way she's started the contest season in 2015, she ain't gonna be losing her crown any time soon. Imagine being enveloped by all that beefy black muscle. At this point in my life it means more than it ever did before - says Margie, which I hope means she ain't going to stop doing what she does to me for a long time to come. Uh-oh, I feel a swoon coming on...




4 GILLIAN KOVACK



Gillian, I noticed you were listed both here and in Omaha as one of the Physique competitors. Was that your idea of a joke? Getting me all worried and all. No joke, she says, wagging a finger. I just wanted to give you a nice surprise. And I was a nice surprise, wasn't I? Well, OK, then. I'm blushing, naturally. You were a lovely surprise. A lovely big surprise? she asks, those big brown eyes searing straight into mine...



She's back. And she's still got that back. A back that moved me so at the same show three years ago now. She was going through her dark hair phase then, now she's back to blond and back to her best. Collected another 4th place at the Toronto Pro yesterday, Gillian really said after the show. Combined with the result in Omaha that should be enough points to qualify me for the Wings of Strength Rising Phoenix Women's Bodybuilding World Championship in San Antonio on Aug 22nd! So after a needed week off I'll be starting my prep. Thankfully, those competitor lists were wrong and the big and beautiful Gillian is still every inch a bodybuilder.




3 JANA BENDOVA



The first of two Czechs who proved to be the dark horses of the show, Jana's name didn't ring any bells before the show, but as soon as I saw the pictures, I recognised her. Not facially, as it happens, but rather it was the insane conditioning, and the striations across her pure muscle pecs in particular, that were familiar.



Muscle Memory tells us that Jana's been competing at European and World level since 2010. She's had some podium finishes, but never managed to win a title. Safe to assume then that she had received one of those discretionary pro cards handed out by national federations - pretty much the only way for European bodybuilders to get on the pro circuit these days. And well-deserved it was I'm sure. She's certainly done whoever was responsible for the award proud in her first pro outing.




2 VERA MIKULCOVA



Last time I remember seeing Vera, she was sweating buckets, emitting deeper grunts than is considered ladylike in most circles, and curling about as much as my car weighs (I may have made that last bit up). I was impressed. And I have to say I am impressed this time around as well. Them's some big ol' biceps she is sporting, and at over 5'8" (1.73m) she carries all that muscle on a seriously statuesque frame.



Like her compatriot Jana, it may appear that Vera has come from nowhere to take 2nd place here, but it's not as though the Czech Republic have never produced quality female bodybuilders, is it? The heirs to Zuzana and Jitka have arrived. And if there was any doubt before, there isn't now. They're serious contenders.




1 CHRISTINE ENVALL



It takes more than a tight layer of clothing to hide muscles like Christine's, and on stage there's no mistaking the quality and quantity she carries these days. Her leg bicep alone was probably worth the price of admission to many of the female bodybuilding fans lucky enough to see Christine take the title in Toronto. 2014 saw her debut at the Olympia after a career spanning more than two decades. Now, just a year on from that career highlight, she's a pro champ for the very first time.



The emotion of her win is there for all to see in the contest galleries, and why shouldn't she be? At 42, she's bound for the Wings of Strength Rising Phoenix World Championships - not exactly a name that slips of the tongue, even if it is rather apt. But I very much doubt Christine gives much of a hoot what it's called, just that she's going to be there, and that one more career highlight might be waiting there for her. In both Omaha and Toronto there have been some surprises. Who knows what surprises might be in store in San Antonio come August 22nd?




Next stop for Female Bodybuilding: Chicago, July 2nd.

Ms Olympia 2014: Christine Envall AT LAST!

The year: 1994. At a local IFBB sanctioned bodybuilding show in the Australian state of Victoria, a 21-year-old with a prodigiously developed physique takes the stage.

Three years have passed since her first appearance at the show, when she had finished third as an 18-year-old. Since then she has won local and state titles at IFBB and NABBA contests, and finished in the top six at the Australasian Championships.

This time she wins the title of "Ms Bendigo". Her name: Christine Envall.




July 5th 2014. Four women are still standing: Lisa Giesbrecht, Juanita Blaino, Rita Bello, and Christine. This is her third show in just over a month. She was 6th in Toronto at the end of May, and finished 3rd in Omaha the following week.

If her name is called next, she will only gain a single point from this show to add to her two from Omaha. She knows three points probably won't be enough to qualify. She will have to compete again, in Tampa in August, and attempt to add to her points tally.

Or wait another year.

But, if another name is called next, she is guaranteed 3rd. Another two points would make a total of four. And four points would be enough. Enough to get her to Vegas.

Christine hears Juanita Blaino's name called in fourth...



A little over-dramatic, perhaps, but sadly I wasn't there so I hope you'll forgive the poetic licence. The double... got the 3rd place I needed... I think should be enough for the O!!! said Christine, sounding a little unsure on her Facebook page after the show.

It was enough. No matter what happened in the final qualifying show of the year in Tampa, no one could push Christine out of the top 5 places. She was, as they say, "Olympia bound". For sure. Brain not comprehending yet!!! she added.



Her incredulity was understandable. Getting to the Olympia is a long road for most female bodybuilders, but Christine's road, which began in her hometown of Bendigo back in 1991, has been longer than most. It has included three NABBA World titles, and two distinct periods of competing as an IFBB pro with an ten-year break between them, punctuated by a one-night-only return to NABBA competition in 2005.




But despite being out of the limelight for the best part of a decade, she had certainly never been forgotten by the female muscle lovin' brethren. When FMS invited readers to select their all-time Fantasy Contest line-ups a couple of years ago, Christine comfortably made the top six. When she returned to the stage last year in Toronto, the pre-contest buzz on the forums was, predictably, all about Christine's return.



She was, after all, the original super freaky muscle woman. She was a "growth experiment fantasy made flesh". She was a huge, rippling female muscle wonder of the world. My own personal Christine highlights would include footage and images of her at the New York Muscle Club; the occasional (and given the sheer amount of muscle on her 5'3" frame and the gusto with which she displayed it, inevitable) posing suit malfunctions; the Awefilms clip where she "discovers" she can flex her pecs; and, best of all, the unbelievably arousing images of her bronzed, naked and ever so slightly coy.







By common consensus, then, it was good to have her back. Of course, there were comparisons with her younger self, comparisons that were not always complimentary (shorter hair, implants) but those who know about these things - those who know more than the likes of you and me, anyway - pointed to the refinements she had made to her physique and agreed Envall v.2013 was presenting the judges a much more pleasing overall look than she had left the scene with a decade earlier.



She did three shows in 2013, her best placing 7th in Chicago. She may not have been as excitingly super freaky as before - while she'd been away, all the girls had got bigger - but up close and personal with Annie Riveccio's camera for Muscle Angels, or even more so with her more intimate Instagram pics - Christine was still packing plenty of freaky size and freaky vascularity for the female muscle head to get excited about.



And, better yet, Christine hadn't come out of "retirement" just to embark on one final lap of the pro circuit. She was going to be back in 2014. 40 years old, promising myself my best years are NOT behind me. Don't sit around re-living your glory days... Get out there and start creating new ones, she told her Instagram followers.



She began with a 6th place in Toronto. No disaster that, but no Olympia qualifying points, either. Then, the following week in Omaha, she finished 3rd...




Finally, at her fifth attempt since her return to competition, she had equalled her best previous pro placing (at the South West Pro Cup in 2002), and she had Olympia points on the board. AND she had got to meet Iris Kyle backstage! What an awesome show! she commented later. It's not every day you get to meet Ms Olympia!



Which brings us to the events in Toronto which guaranteed that this Friday, at the age of 41, the legendary and much-loved Christine Envall will make her Olympia debut.



Less than 2 weeks till the Ms O! she wrote last week. Can't believe the workouts I've been having... Must be the extra motivation of the biggest show of my LIFE. It's an understatement to say I'm looking forward to stepping on the Olympia stage...



It's an understatement to say she has earned it.



Good luck to you, Christine!

And to whet your collective whistles at the prospect of the original super freak on stage in Vegas in a few days, Christine's routine from this year's Toronto Pro show.



Enjoy!