Arnold Classic 2017: I Wish...

I wish I was the backstage pizza delivery guy.



Though I wouldn't have lasted long in the job cos I would probably not have collected much money from the ladies. Heather Dees (left) would have definitely got a freebie for a single flex of that beautiful veiny bicep of hers, for example. Actually, if I'm honest, Heather would have got a freebie just for being Heather Dees.

I wish there were more strongwoman contests attached to bodybuilding events.



Not going to make a big impassioned argument for it, but I don't see how it could be anything but good. Might bring in a slightly bigger audience, showcases a different type of hot and hard woman, and adds a different type of competition to the event.

I wish all clothes shop assistants greeted you like this...



I would do a lot more clothes shopping if so. A LOT more. I'd be dragging the wife out to the lanes, where I'd see guys just like me, six bags in each hand, explaining to their better halves that there was plenty of time to drop into just one or two more boutiques before the parking expires. "You can never have too much gymwear, darling."

I wish the abs flash was compulsory at check-in.




So few women do it - trust me, I check these things religiously. Four out of thirty in the Physique International field represents an unusually bumper Abs Flash Rate (AFR). So much much love to B, Zoa, Cinzia and Diana for their blatant exhibitionism - if I'd been judging, they'd have started the contest with Abs Flash Bonus Points (AFBPs).

I wish I could see what that statue has seen.



Another abs flash. Note how the lighting seems to be just right.

I wish Natalia Coehlo would just let herself grow.



How thick are those pecs?! If she ever decides Physique is for her and we see her flexing her delicious muscles in anger I may just die and go to heaven. Although having said that, if this is the future of Figure then Figure has a very big and very bright future indeed. Natalia is on the right as you look in case you were in any doubt.

I wish I was Ariel Khadr's wardrobe assistant, and/or I was going to that party.



I would certainly be smiling at least as much as the gingernut over Diana's shoulder.

I wish Miss Fit was a movie franchise. Starring Denise, of course.



And I can totally see Theresa as the nerdy (but ultimately equally kick-ass) assistant.

I wish "The Freaky 3" were the new "Charlie's Angels".



I've got thousands of these TV and movie ideas, by the way.

All terrific, as Donald would say.

And, though the Physique International field was amazing and all that...



I wish Dani had competed.

Bolton: Where the Strongwomen Are

Strongman Bolton first took place in 2010, on a playground with a couple of hundred people watching, according to Andy Seddon, Director of Angry Anvils, the company that spearheads the event. This year we are looking at attracting 8,000. Last year [before a 6,000-strong city centre crowd] was just incredible. The event's mission statement is "To promote positive attitudes, health, fitness and community cohesion and involvement through strength training and competition", and for that alone I would be sorely tempted to plug it, but the reason why FMS is getting fully behind Strongman Bolton 2014 is (you've probably guessed by now) because for the first time the organisers have invited the strong women to come and play.

And how the Strong Women have responded! On 7th May, Mr. Seddon reported on the event's Facebook page that the Strong Woman class is FULL! A report in the local media suggested that means about a dozen strong women right in the very centre of Bolton on Saturday July 26th. Back in January I really wasn't sure what kind of response we'd receive, Seddon says, but the interest has been brilliant.



I'm competing for the experience, to have some fun and to raise money for a brain injury charity called Headway, says 23-year-old Ellie Griffiths, who is about to complete her five-year Veterinary Medicine degree at the University of Liverpool.

And it's all completely gratis! The event is completely free for standing spectators, although if you do fancy watching the whole thing from the comfort of one of 50 seats in marquees around the arena in Victoria Square, you just need to fork out a mere £8. Or why not push the boat out? £11 will get you one of only 25 front row seats.



Charlotte Kirby only started strength training in January, and the Bolton event, which is the biggest and best-attended amateur Strongman event in the UK, will be only her second ever. 27-year-old Charlotte, who hails from Essex and loves '70s rock, rather intriguingly lists her occupation as 'Adult Entertainment Industry'.

Follow the Strongman Bolton Facebook page for information about the event, and those tickets for the seating if you want any. In addition, profiles of more of the Strong Women who will be competing on 26th July will no doubt be put up there before long.

Feel 100% free to reblog this, or send the Facebook link to anyone you think might be interested. Hell, why not take your special lady friend along to the event? You never know, these Strong Women might serve to inspire her to start lifting herself.