Sad to say that for a while at least FMS is not going to be posting anything new.
Some real life stuff is going on that absolutely requires my full attention, and unfortunately that is going to have to take precedence. With luck, it won't be too long before FMS returns, but at the moment it's impossible to say when that will be.
2 x Ms Figure Olympia, Cydney Gillon
You might, as they are (sort of) just in, want to check out the Olympia results and galleries on NPC News Online at some stage this week - I know I will! FMS fave Cydney Gillon has defended her Figure title, and in Juliana's absence, Shanique Grant has fulfilled her destiny. UK fans can enjoy Louise Rogers (finally at the Olympia) in Figure, plus our two Fitness Olympians, Emma Paveley and Kate Errington.
Shanique Grant - (the new) Ultimate Physique
And why not check out the archive?
Over 7 years of the finest contemporary female muscle plus the occasional look back at female muscle times past. And since Saturday, 8th September 2012 (with the odd break here and there) we've endeavoured to bring you a post a day, and we started that week, appropriately enough, with seven posts devoted to... ALINA POPA!
Our first, and (almost) our last (for now)
Sadly, not all the images from the last 7 years are still up there, but my musings - inane, insane and very occasionally insightful (if I say so myself) - are 100% intact.
I've LOVED reporting on the big pro and amateur shows, and the best of British female muscle. I've also LOVED choosing FMS' Women of the Year, and - with your very great help - compiling five lists of alternative female beauty - the Hot and Hard 100.
The Hottest Hard Woman in the World 2017-2018
I'll still be about on the forums, in the chatrooms, on Skype, on Discord, MyCircle, and Tumblr - look out for 6ft1swell (or similar) and say hi - or steer well clear, it's up to you!
Found myself on compulsory temporary leave in November, which wasn't so bad - I needed a break. Rather upset about the identity of my replacement though, and the reprobate duly lived up to my expectations by stealing some of my notes to use as the theme of his most eloquent post. Most of the time November was about wanking to female muscle, as far as I can see. It is his declared hobby - I have a copy of his CV here - and the "friends" of his who also contributed seem to be into it just as much as he is.
We always had our tea around 6, so C. Moore whacked in a VHS around 5.55 and munched away on his fish fingers or whatever safe in the knowledge that later in the evening, once parents were safely tucked away in bed upstairs, he would be free to review, replay, rewind and frame advance at his leisure, with a pint of orange squash (fluids important, but that hardly qualifies as a top tip) and a box of mansize tissues.
Better to be alone with her and them. The garage makes me think of lube for some reason and just as I do my lube of choice starts leaking out. Polish the joy trumpet, make it glisten like her perfect skin sweaty after a hard gloot sesh. My (actual) head begins to tilt back in ecstasy, my eyes begin to roll, and my whole body starts to shake. Moaning, gasping, bucking, gooning, my prayer reaches an ecstatic climax...
Back to her place. "I would invite you all in," she tells us as she unlocks her door and steps into her apartment, "but, you know, early morning cardio..." She steps out of her shoes. "I didn't get this body by staying up all night." Again, I feel no disappointment. It's been a privilege to spend this time with her, just to be in her presence. But it's not quite over yet. She slips out of her dress to reveal her beautiful naked body in all its magnificence. She hits a series of poses - arms, chest, thighs, abs... It's too much, overwhelming. I feel my legs trembling, my head spinning...
My absolute go-to clip is Tazzie Colomb, huge and sweaty and although she begins with a little top on, it doesn't last long. That gorgeous deep and sexy Southern accent, and lots of arrogant flexing to camera and for herself in the mirror. Towards the end of the clip she bench presses some serious weight for 20 reps (as I recall), topless, her pumping pecs glistening with sweat and swelling bigger and bigger. That would be the ultimate - to be there, hard and ready to do her bidding, to get my face between her legs and lap away, to be muscle f***ed unconscious as she rises from the bench totally fired up, dripping wet and ready to destroy the first hard cock she sees...
It was a "moment", many many joy trumpets sounding out more or less simultaneously as the contest photos go up. For a day or two at any given time there is a Natalia tribute happening somewhere in the world. For a day or two we (maybe not all of us, but the vast majority) are all looking at the same body.
Some women achieve incredible contest glootage at maybe one or two shows in their competitive lives. Very few achieve it again and again in their career, and Cathy LeFrançois has arguably done it better than anyone for well over two decades.
And so we goon. Speaking becomes tricky. I would say we debated the various merits of these magnificent examples of womanly gloothood, but you hardly call my bud yelling "Zoa is FERRRRRRM bruvva!" and me yelling "Yeah but Michaela is HAAAAAAARD dude!" a debate as such, but the sheer physical pleasure (expressed in moans, in gasps, in animal yelps and bellows) flows through our bodies with beautiful intensity, and sharing the feeling takes it to a whole new level of ecstasy.
This being a fantasy, the women absolutely LOVE it. All our hard cocks lined up for them. They eyeball their victims, show them where they want it, hit the pose and BAM! another load flies stageward, another poor drooling muscle lover has to start all over again - we're all full of viagra or some such, so staying hard is no issue!
Just outside the top 6 on the day, and runner-up in C. Moore's reaction rankings is Amanda Smith, who was making her pro debut (that's what the minions tell me anyway). Whatever. WOW! Minions also say she's fast-becoming a forum favourite over at the place where men pretend to be women in the chat room. Whatever.
Great Glootz of the 21st Century: Masterpieces
Horizontal, lateral and vertical size. C. Moore has measured a few pairs of cheeks with my special virtual measuring tool, and trust me, Heather's glootz went both wider, deeper, higher and further out than any before or since. MASSIVE meat.
NPC NATIONALS 2017
Swell returned for our annual review of the Nationals. It was good to be back.
Once again the Overall Bodybuilding champion came from outside the Heavyweight class. Fallon Brinsonwas a Physique competitor this time last year, and will be a Physique competitor next year, but by becoming a Light-heavyweight Bodybuilder for a day, she was able to earn her pro card. Switching up for the one show was the smart move. Fallon only had to beat one other Light-Heavyweight to get to the Overall posedown, and was one of a total of just 16 women in the Bodybuilding classes, compared to the 44 potential rivals she would have faced in Physique.
In the Figure division, we especially enjoyed phenoms Martina Harris (Overall winner); Capucine Leconte (Class "A" winner); Kessia Mirellys (Class "A" runner-up); and Debi Laszewski's girl, Brittany Miller (runner-up in the "D" class).
It was long overdue, so even if she would never have beaten her former self, news that Jennifer Kennedy - one of the best-reviewed of those FBBs who like to get up-close and personal with their fans - had been awarded her pro card was most welcome.
Kristina Nicole Mendoza and Carla Maria Bradley were our Beautiful Beasts from the Heavyweight Bodybuilding class. Inexplicably, neither made the top 3.
The standout division was, as always seems to be the case at these national level shows now, the Physique division. Far too many gorgeous, muscle sexy women to mention all of them - but the cream of the cream included Lauren Hanford - who had only decided to compete for the first time 17 weeks previously; Ashley Fuller with "a bit of the Susan-Marie Smith vibe about her"; the "must have been mighty close to taking the Overall" Rachael Chaskey; and Lisa Luettinger and her quads.
And finally, for that week, and for our look back at 2017 - Jacquelyn Hickerson.
She f***ing ruled! Happily, this was one of those all too rare occasions when the judges and my loins were in full agreement about the outcome. And obviously Jacquelyn felt like the right woman was going home with the trophy as well.
Our Olympia review began (a little tardily, I admit) with a reminder that these days there isn't A Ms Olympia, but four. The Ms Olympia was last held in 2014, and since then we've had four Ms Olympias each year and yet no [one with the actual title of] Ms Olympia. And the four from 2017 - two new, two recrowned were: Oksana Grishina (Ms Fitness Olympia), Cydney Gillon (Ms Figure Olympia), Angelica Teixeira (Ms Bikini Olympia), and Juliana Malacarne (Ms Physique Olympia).
And then there was Natalia...
It is indeed scary to think how excited I might be getting looking at Natalia three years down the road. My ticker barely made it through her Olympia appearance this year. I really should schedule a check-up, but you know, it's finding the time to do it...
Britain's Emma Paveley took full advantage of her first Olympia experience, keeping the party going long after she had taken her place on stage among her sport's elite.
And we confessed to enjoying the Physique Olympia so much we ended up actually sympathising with the judges. Fact is, there were 26 amazing women on that stage, and it can't have been an easy job choosing between such a magnificently muscled line-up. You have to go on something, and if that something is "she looks to have made improvements from what I remember from her last year", then there's not much we can do about it. Relax. Enjoy the muscle. There's plenty of it.
We did reserve a special mention for our favourite Physique swoon though, especially given the pasting some forum twazzock had given here earlier in the year: Well, I think it's safe to say this opinionated forum member's nice little half-baked Dani demise theory (posted mid-August) hasn't exactly turned out to be 100% accurate. He's clearly not a Dani fan, whereas I'm proud to say I am. Anytime Dani's got a posing suit on I'm happy, and given the doom-laden predictions (our forum posting friend offered one of many) I was very pleasantly surprised to see she'd lost none of her sparkle and that bod is as spectacular as ever. Love the hair too! I could thank him for making my expectations so low I couldn't possibly have been disappointed by Dani's package, but that would suggest I had paid his fantasy theory some mind. I didn't.
[you so obviously did - ed.]
Collectively though, there was general agreement on the one debut Physique Olympian who should have placed much much higher - Jill Diorio. And those calves of hers.
She was in the sort of condition where even her cheeks looked ripped. "At the Olympia she looked SICK!" a forum poster noted, "Too cut for the judges, but I LOVE IT!" He was not alone. She was, we collectively decided, "exceptional", "flawless", "breath-taking". Her back double biceps in particular got the boys' attention. "Rock hard, symmetrical, big and sexy!" wrote one fan. "One of the best physiques I've ever seen."
Events came thick and fast in October. We'd barely got our breath back after Jill and those calves before we were swooning all over the place for some of Europe's best amateur talent, with our focus at the start of the week on the British contingent.
We have a new champion. Rising British Bodyfitness star Danielle "Dani" Osborn won her "up to 168cm" class, and though following in the footsteps of Carly Thornton ("short" Physique, 2015) and Emma Paveley ("short" Fitness, 2016), she's the very first British Bodyfitness athlete to be a class winner there.
And there was Linda Gartside. Always a pleasure.
2017: The girl who was once too embarrassed to join a gym and instead worked out with dumbbells in her garage as Arnold looked on from the cover of his book is about to go on stage at his event and perform under his banner. Her "soul dream", she calls it, is about to come true. She's 47. And (once again) happy in her own skin. "Linny had been lost for some time," says Rochdale's finest, "the Arnold Classic Europe was where I found "me" again. The moment I gave up the chase for winning, I regained my inner freedom, and found my happiness. I have found the "me" that I lost."
It wasn't all about the Brits though.
Spanish champ and Overall Physique winner Laura Pintado and "the big and beautiful Czech dream" Alena Hatvani gave us plenty to swoon over.
A brief pause in contest reporting for this year's breakthrough swoon.
Paige is suddenly everywhere, "The Female Hercules" (with girl-next-door looks), she reminds of Monica Mollica, Lauren Quinn, and (no higher praise, surely) Heather Policky "only hotter" (?!). She's "The Nerd Beast", and "the female muscle find of the year". Where did she come from? I think I'm in love. So, that's you, me, and just about every other head who's been turned on to Paige so far - 8,000+ IG followers and I'm guessing they are not all budding WPD competitors.
Absolutely unprecedented, and most welcome - FMS' favourite female muscle contest lensman, Eastlabs' Igor Kopcek, was at the recent UKBFF British Championships doing what he does so well. For once, I am able to put together a report on the show where my problem is not where to find images without big f*** off watermarks saying DO NOT F***ING COPY all over them, but how to choose which of the 2,799(!) images of the female classes to include. I've been in heaven for the last few hours, and I don't mind admitting it. Mr Kopcek, I doff my chapeau to you, sir!
Any excuse to post gorgeous muscle women like Victoria Puentes in their little black dresses, but this time it was a website promising "Female Bodybuilder Dating" and the advice of a forum bod who'd loved (and lost) three different muscle women that got us righteously indignant. Don't seek their help, don't follow his advice - he lost them, remember? Go to a gym. Trust me, it's where they are. They'll admit it, too.
And we finished October and entered November with, depending on who you believe, an inspired addition to the collection of female muscle niches we have collated over the years, or a new low for a blog that's hardly had its most a stellar of years.
[dude! you've got to start letting these things lie - ed.]
