Thursday, 15 August 2013

Denise Masino

You want to do WHAT?!

Half the bite of a meatball sub accompanied the exclamation out of the FMS editor's mouth. He surveyed the mess he had made on his desk and glared at me with contempt.

A clean Denise Masino post, JJ. No pussy.

He half-heartedly wiped meatball fragments, sauce and spit from one of the prints he had splattered, gave up and threw the print and the napkin down with disgust.

Denise Masino. And not one shot of her pussy?

Not one.

Swell, he said, picking up the half-eaten sub again. You're a freaking madman.

He bit into the sub and eyed me suspiciously. He hadn't noticed but sauce was oozing out of the end of the sandwich, covering any of the remaining prints that had escaped the initial splattering.

It's never been done before JJ. That's the point.

It was an idea that had been germinating for some time, and in Legs Month I saw an opportunity to finally realise it. After all, Denise may have spectacular bits, but so much else about her is equally spectacular, and those bits are framed by a pair of spectacular legs. And due to all the fuss about and focus on her bits, I'd always felt those legs had been criminally underrated. But the genesis of the idea had come many many months before, and had been born out of what I perceived as a slight on Denise the competitive bodybuilder, Denise the IFBB pro, rather than Denise the female muscle porn mogul.

It came while watching a youtube clip of her at the Arnold, or, more accurately, while listening to the commentary while watching her Arnold routine. What irked me so much about the commentators was their complete lack of acknowledgement for Denise as one of the competitors. Instead, she's described as an 'enterprising young woman', who has 'made quite a lot of money'. Her success in that respect shows, according to the commentators, that 'what happens on stage doesn't necessarily dictate what happens off stage'.

And then they talk about how her routine is good and sexy and how this fits in with her off stage persona, as if she's bothered putting together the routine purely as advertising for her other activities. In fact, that had started to piss me off by that stage too, the way they never once spelt out exactly what her successful enterprises involved directly, but kept referring to her 'business activities', as if she had invested in restaurants or something.

Maybe I was being too sensitive, but Denise Masino, whatever her 'activities' outside the competitive arena are, was nevertheless one of the top professional female bodybuilders of her day. She competed at the highest level for over ten years, and during the golden age of weight classes, had a string of top six finishes as a lightweight. My point is, and this is pretty much exactly how I put it to JJ that day in the office, Denise Masino can be appreciated for her 'liberation' of female muscle. I have absolutely no problem with that. But equally, there should be times when we simply wax lyrical about her hard-earned muscles and the wonderful physique she has sculpted. Just as we would for any other top pro.

Denise and pussy go together like... he looked around, searching for a similie, and noticing the sauce-covered prints, finding one. Like freaking meatballs and sauce.

The anger had gone from his voice, replaced by resignation. He didn't want to argue, he wanted his PA to get the cleaner in and then get him another meatball sub - not necessarily in that order. I could sense victory. JJ would let me put the post together.



  1. One of the first FBBs I came across on the Internet... I still got those sweet memories...

  2. Fabulous Body. One of the best in the world. Bits and all included